Chasing

Am I trying too hard?

Am I not giving off enough hints that I want you to talk to me?

I just miss you more than anything right now

This could be a bad idea laying all this out on the internet

I don't even know if you read this

It could just be a bunch of random people looking at this..

I wish I knew

I wish I knew what was going on your head

I just want so desperately for you to call me..

I've already call twice these past few days

But your step-mom said you weren't home

I've sent you a message on tumblr

But you haven't replied

I've even sent you a email..

Which you also haven't replied to

Should I just get it through my head that I'm just a crazy ex-girlfriend?

          that maybe you really are done with me?

          that you're happier without me?

          that you're avoiding me?

I don't know..

i guess I should give up

everyone is telling me too

it just seems a little tough for me to take

that the first boy who wanted to marry me would change his mind in 3 months I figure I would linger in you a little longer

marriage is kind of a big deal to me

because in my head when i said i want to marry you it translated to i want to spend the rest of my life with you and I would never want anything else

feelings like this take a bit more time to fade

at least for me it does

I hope you do call

 and say something how you didn't know I called and apologize profusely

 I don't want to chase you

there's no point

I'll just end up sad even more sad..

I really hate that I'm bearing all this on here

but honestly I don't know what else to do but hope that you read this and call 

I need some closure before I can fully move on from this